A relationship will always have ups and down (hopefully more ups)
As one gets older though, and becomes more established money becomes more of a factor.
Could a couple afford a home, provide for a family, or just sustain financial stability for themselves?
I have two friends who are in serious relationships with their boyfriends. They love them dearly but both wishthey had jobs that paid better. One's boyfriend works as a florist and the other's boyfriend works as a messenger.
They're good and honorable jobs but they don't pay as much as say, a CEO of a huge corporation.
It seems that the issue of a job becomes more serious as one becomes older. Both my friends graduated from college this year.
It's a tough decision, but is love really more powerful than money (especially when the relationship becomes more serious?)
Do you think a well paying job matters in a partner? Does it make more of a difference if it's a man? Does money play a big role in your relationship?
Comments (29)
In the end, I know that if I were to marry someone who will make as much or more than I will just because they make the money, I wouldn't be happy. So love is love, and my grandparents got through rougher times than I'll ever have to, and they were married 50 years before my grandfather died.
No, money is not important, although it helps.YES it is important...though some people base the whole marriage on money,which is taking it too far. but depending on the people and their backgrounds and families, money is important and can cause problems and arguments. i've seen it happen many many times. bickering starts because things start falling apart and thenpeople start pointing fingers
Yes, money is important in a relationship but much love is much much more important. My husband and I are lucky enough that we both work, and he has a good job. We are able to go out to eat, go to movies and have fun on the weekend without constantly checking the bank account. But, if we did have less all that would matter is that we're together.
My best friend and her husband both went to college (she graduated with honors) and yet they both have relatively low paying jobs because of the economy and the job market. I don't know his salary, but she only makes $8.50 an hour. Despite that, they are able to rent a nice townhouse and entertain themselves by doing free or cheap activities like renting movies or taking their dogs for a long walk.
I think it's a bad idea to be with someone based on how much money they make or how much money they could potentially make in the future.
Of course money is important. But there is so much more to a relationship. Does the couple work together towards goals? Do they even have the same goals? Those are more important than how much money a person makes - because that can change drastically in hardly any time at all!
My husband and I have been through a lot of financial changes through the course of our relationship. We are currently working towards financial changes that would be highly beneficial! Of course, that entails another 4 years of school for me and putting off the extra money. In the long run it will be worth it. We will get through the years of lower income, just like we have before AND be better for it because we will be prepared to save money for the long run!
Love is great but it doesnt help pay the bills. I want to be a stay-at-home-mom, atleast to a second child but with my bf, I dont see that happening. I am going to be a teacher, which wont make a lot of money to begin with but Im afraid that his job wont even come close. I dont even know if by the time my job really gets going, it wont be worth him bringing in an extra thousand or so even if we can always use more money. By then he might as well stay at home with the kids to fend off the day care bills. BUT I WANT TO STAY AT HOME!!!! Ugh, maybe we can switch... I take on the first 20-30 years in teaching while he works off our retirement years.lol. I guess I dont want to care for a baby when Im 55. I guess if the "traditional roles" were still in effect then I would love to be a housewife while he goes and earns a living but that wont happen with us unless things for him change. He wants to be a chef but well paying jobs for cooks are in is short supply here.
I think a well-paying job matters in a partner only if you want a well-paying job lifestyle. I understand that no one wants to live check-by-check (I forgot wht that term is) but there are others who want something beyond stability.
It only makes a difference if the couple thinks it does, in my opinion. I know that right now, I'm making more than my (ex-military) boyfriend and that I'll be supporting the both of us while he goes through college and it's not a big deal to either of us. I know he appreciates it but I mean... What choice do I really have? Tell him he's screwed? Absolutely not. We love each other and we're going to make it work for richer or poorer (as the saying goes).
Money absolutely matters; you can't have a relationship based solely on feelings. However, it is actually your attitudes and beliefs about money, not the amount of money you make, that make the difference. Money is one of the things couples fight about and struggle with the most, so it's an issue that shouldn't be taken lightly. For example, if a penny-pincher and a spendthrift got married, they'd probably fight a LOT.
Whether or not your friends stay in their relationships is entirely up to them. They have to decide for themselves what they are willing and able to live on and with and what they aren't. If they love the guys more than a comfortable lifestyle, they should stay with them. If they love financial security more than the guys they're dating, they should move on. But ultimately, they have to live with whatever they choose, so it's really up to them to decide what they want in life.
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Well if they both graduated, I take it the florist and messenger were
sort of temporary part time jobs? I wouldn't worry all too much about
it since chances are good they might get a job with better pay. Money
is important in a relationship to sustain a decent lifestyle, unrelated
to the love of course.
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