This past weekend, a bunch of my buddies from law school came to visit me in NYC. We're all in the same boat: young, well-educated, and looking for jobs in this god-forsaken economy. What is different, however, is our stances on money and spending during this particular time.
One of my friends, let's just call him, "A," comes from a well-to-do doctor's family. His parents are nice enough to support him through all his schooling and personal endeavors, so he doesn't have any student loans or anything major financially to worry about. My other friend, "B", comes from a struggling small business owner family background. Her parents own a tiny daycare and have no real way of retiring since they were never able to build a nest egg. She's made her way through this world by scholarships and student loans and is extremely stressed out by the lack of jobs right now.
Personally, I fall somewhere in between. I come from a squarely middle class family. My father's job as a corporate America henchman enabled us to be fine on a single income, but I do have school loans and I'm not relying on them for my day-to-day living. I like nice things (obviously who doesn't) but I only buy name brand items as a splurge.
You can imagine how stressful this weekend turned out to be. If A suggested a restaurant, B usually balked at the price. If B suggested a place, A thought it was too plain and not "vacation" enough. Same thing with all sorts of entertainment. A would always want to go out and party. B would want to stay in and rent a movie or play the Wii. By the end of their trip, I wanted to tear my hair out.
Ultimately, we went to 1 really nice dinner, and several cheap eats (but still good) places for our other meals. We went to a fancy club one night, and stayed in on two other evenings and just hung out. I'm just glad that we all survived the weekend without our friendships coming to an end, but it was still ridiculously stressful.
Do you have friends that would constantly push you to go over your budget? Or someone who you find to be a complete cheapskate? What do you do in either situation?
Comments (7)
this is interesting. I think every group of might have this problem. I think we are all here for a good time, and i can't stand someone who continuously brings up money as a problem then again i also cant stand someone who is rude and inconsiderate. I think it's a good idea that your friends can find a middle ground sounds like yall had fun!
Thankfully, I don't have this kind of problem with my college friends.
There's like this understanding among us when to be a complete
cheapskate and when we would use the money for leisure and pleasurable
reason (no matter how expensive it is).
It's all about compromise, and it sounds like you handled it very well.
omg... -_-
With my college friends, we know when to be a cheapskate and when to be generous. Generous during special occasions like birthdays and cheap other times when we just hang out. ;)
When my friends hang out, and one of us ends up being at opposite ends of the financial spectrum, my richer friends tend to help out on the bill if they insist we go out to a more expensive joint. Like, they'll pick up the entire tab, or, we'll just pitch in cash for drinks or whatever.
well i have a friend A who wants to party all the time and go out and spend lots of money (however she never wants to pay for herself she is a moocher) and another friend B who doesn't want to go out and party as much because they will have to pay for A as well. and I am C who doesnt really want to spend very much so i just pretend i dont have very much money on me :)
so since we are all broke students we end up doing something chill :)
and when my money spending friends want to go out and i dont want to spend money on that i just say i have a lot of work to do or not enough money. which is true! because most of it isnt in my budget
I know this girl, I wouldn't call her a friend though, sorta more like we hang with the same ppl. I am a broke college student who has loans, scholarships, grants and work two part on campus jobs. She isn't nor doesn't have to.
I didn't notice at first but she always mentions how her dad will pay for this and that. It gets really annoying. I know that yeah I talk about money alot-- usually cause I can't go out b/c I'm saving my money or I have to go to work. But I hate her reaction, she always laughs or smiles in reaction to me talking about how broke I am. Don't shrug your shoulders and stated that you don't have that problem b/c your dad will pay for everything.
It pisses me off so much.