Dollarish featured a
post about tipping. Tipping is something that always seems to get to me. So, I thought I would talk about it.
The post talked about reasons for leaving a poor tip: lousy service, expensive food, not having enough money.
First I'll approach the second two, which are really the same issue. If you don't have the money to pay for the food and for the service, then don't eat out. If you feel the food is too expensive then eat somewhere that isn't expensive. If you are shorting the waitress because you can't afford the food, or because you decided the food is overpriced, then you're making yourself look like a fool. It's not her fault you can't afford to, or are too cheap to eat there. Don't punish them for your issues.
Now, in regards to the lousy service, I don't tip based on service or at least not fully. God gives me grace not based on who I am or what I've done, but despite of both. I don't deserve any of what He has done for me, and He has given to me generously. And I try to keep this in mind when tipping my waiter. I tip a waitress a minimum of $3, even if I only had a glass of tea and no food, it's not her fault that I didn't order a meal. I go with that minimum of $3, or if it is more expensive I tip a minimum of 20-25% of the total regardless of the service. If the waitress does a good job than I give more, but, never less.
Sadly from my experience most Christians tip very poorly, and tip based off of things either beyond the waiter's control (you know Sunday lunch is incredibly busy in most places right?) or based on the waiter's works. We are given grace despite of our works, we should treat the waitress with that same grace. If we choose to tip poorly it makes us look unloving and even cruel. We aren't any better than the people who are waiting on us. "So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets."
How do you tip? What do you think about tipping based off of grace? If you have been a waiter/waitress, what impression do you get of a person based on their tips?Image Source
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Comments (121)
MagisterTom I know you are a Christian but I'm not, nor do I want you to try to convert me. Just saying. Because the last part of your post doesn't apply to me.
So I think it's fair that if the waiter is rude to me and purposely does something to make my experience at the restaurant bad, I'm not tipping.
I'm a server at two different places, and I agree with you totally. Generally speaking, Sundays are bad days for tips. And the Sunday rush doesn't just apply to Christians, anyone can go out and eat and be terribly insulted that their server doesn't wait on them hand and foot.
There really is NO excuse for not tipping. 9 times out of 10, if you have a bad experience at a restaurant, it's your own damn fault. If you ask your server for fifteen different things and they only have time to bring you ten, be happy with the ten. Yes, waiters make mistakes, but most of us will apologize and fix it as best we can.
And that 1 out of 10 comes from the fact that your server is a person. You try being objectified, belittled, and generally treated like a worthless human being for $3 an hour and see if you can smile at every last person with a snide remark.
@SleepyLaura@xanga - but what if you ask for just your meal (no frills, exactly how it's listed on a menu) and the waiter not only gets it wrong but it arrives cold because he is hitting on his co-worker? you still think this guy deserves a decent tip?
@snapeful@xanga - I totally agree with you. If the waitress wants a good tip, she should do the things that bring her to deserve a good tip, it's just that simple.
"So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets."
Well, if the waiter wishes that people would tip them well, they should be a good waiter. It's a process.
@SleepyLaura@xanga - Yes, actually, there are plenty of reasons out there not to tip. Racist remarks that you can hear PLAINLY, are one thing. But I don't blame you for not thinking of that because you're white, so racism doesn't apply to you. Obviously I doubt you've ever had to experience that.
@snapeful@xanga - I'm sorry that servers or anyone for that matter has made any racist or inappropriate remarks. The reason that it didn't occur to me was because as a professional, and a decent person, it is something I would never do.
But the fact that you said racism DOESN'T apply to me because I am white is a racist statement.
@symmys02@xanga - No, tell that guy's manager so he can be fired and those of who actually work for the tip can get the job. This post wasn't about bad service, it was about the customer not tipping.
My biggest problem with this post is it feels like it is being stated that waitresses [or waiters] have no other form of income BUT the tips they receive, as if, by us not tipping them, we are depriving them personally. We all know this is not the case. Tipping is not mandatory, however, it is polite, and I believe this addition should be earned, rather than expected. Bad service should be, "Punished," by no tip. They have done nothing to show that they were happy to serve me. Why should I personally feel the need to line their pockets? Just, "Doing the job," shouldn't be rewarded with a tip either, but again, we deem that as rude, so just, "Doing it," should be given the minimum tip [What, like, 10% of the order? Whatever is customary]. Now doing a job WELL deserves a real tip. That is my opinion.
*is completely ignoring the fact that the statement, "Racism doesn't apply to white people," was ACTUALLY stated and truthfully thought to be a factual statement. lulz*
I agree even though I'm not a Christian. How is it the waiter's fault that you couldn't afford going to a nice restaurant AND tip accordingly? That is incredibly rude. I have never worked in that industry but I have volunteered to serve food once in awhile and I understand all the hard work they do and I always make sure to tip well. At some places, the tip is pooled and I don't want to take it out on the rest of the good servers (and possibly the bussers, etc.) for the lack in customer service on my end. What if that person was simply just having a bad day?
I was a server, so I tend to tip well. I start at 20% and if the service is exceptional the sky is the limit. I've tipped an amount equal to the total of the check, and I'm NOT talking about an amount equal to the cost of a McDonald's value meal. If the service really sucks my tip really sucks, and I can count on one hand the number of times I've left a terrible tip. I once flipped a dime on the table right in front of the server. He earned it, and that's the point. I have never stiffed a server, never. If I stiffed they might think it was an accident, so if the service sucks they get a dime or quarter. The tip is based on service, that's the server's trade. Really good servers are often few and far between. I've tipped a server very well, even when everything else about the meal sucked, so I do offer a certain amount of grace.
I believe in sending a message with a tip, when a message is needed. As a Christian I believe Christians need to be good tippers. Do not ever leave a religious tract as a tip. The server isn't there for you to proselytize, he/she's there to earn money to pay her/his bills. He/she needs to turn that table you're sitting at, so he/she can get some butts in those chairs, cause you left a tract instead of money he/she needs for the rent. If you are a Christian and you don't tip well, you are an asshole. Do not let anyone know you're a Christian, cause you're a lousy excuse for one.
@Nevando@hardestlevel - According to Paywizard.org,
"A tip is wage according to the Fair Labor Standard Act (FLSA). You are a tipped employee - that's for example a waitress or bellboy - if you receive regularly and costomarily more than $30 a month in tip. If so, your employer is only required to pay $2.13 an hour in direct wages if that amount plus the tips received equals at least the federal minimum wage of $6,55 per hour. "
http://www.paywizard.org/main/Minimumwageandovertime/MinimumWageTIPRecevers
And that's exactly the same amount I was paid back in 1991, when I served tables. So yeah, servers do live off their tips.
@SleepyLaura@xanga - I wasn't racist. You just get better conditions because you're white. Racism is demeaning, though I was rather grim when I said that. I'm happy that you think of yourself that you would never offend anybody that way but it's something people who are minorities in the US experience at least once in their lifetime.
Waiters/waitresses/servers have jobs I could never perform with my sanity in tact. Unless they blatantly, obviously are putting forth no effort, I give good tips. They deserve it far more than most people realize.
@snapeful@xanga - i agree. half of this post is irrelevant to me.
I agree with you Thomas...I think blessing some one despite the service or circumstance is a great idea. Jesus would give and then give some more. That is God's character. Giving you something not based on whether you deserve it or not, because we know that we are all sinful humans with faulty characters, who make mistakes every day. But God chose to give his all (his son, Jesus Christ) because he genuinely loves us. We should be a cheerful giver as well, no matter what is thrown at us.
Galatians 2:20
I kinda think servers are similar to business people (or people who try to sell you stuff). People who don't give good service simply deserve little to no tip. I lucky have never experienced a bad service so meh.
when tipping isn't necessary, i will tip anyways depending on the service. i remember one time when i had THE worst waitress in the world. she messed up two out of three orders, she forgot two OTHER orders, and she never came to ask how we were doing. IN THE END, she gave us our check *WHILE WE WERE STILL EATING MIND YOU* and wrote all over it and said thank you and drew a bunch of smileys on it. i was infuriated that she forgot all of our stuff, yet decided to draw all over the damn receipt. maybe if she spent more time on our orders rather than drawing smileys, i would have given her a better tip. i even loudly said how horrible the service was and i didn't even want to give her the small 15% tip. she was behind me and even though i felt terrible about it, in a way i thought she deserved it. i usually tip 20-25% and sometimes even 30%. but only when they deserve it. if i get crap service, they'll usually get crap in return.
i work in the business industry too. i work hard to get my money. i'm not going to give it to someone who does less work in my opinion because it's the polite thing to do. im going to give them how much they deserve to get!
I love that some people dismissed this as irrelevant to them. You're not a Christian, therefore good manners are not relevant to you? And the person who stated that tips are not part of a servers wages is flat out wrong. When you do not tip, you are depriving a server of actual wages and potentially causing them to make less than even minimum wage. If a server is rude or gives bad service, you need to address it with their manager. Not tipping will not fix the problem, it will only make you look like a jerk.
@snapeful@xanga - I agree. Throughout the entire post, I was thinking, "What does it have to do with being Christian, when there are plenty of people who eat out who aren't Christian? The fact of the matter is that for those who go to expensive restaurants who know they can barely or not even afford the food are idiots.
@scrambledmegsntoast@xanga - Just because someone claims that they are not a Christian doesn't mean that they don't have manners. The fact that if waiters and waitresses do give bad service, a bad tip should be a hint to them. Leaving a tip has nothing to do with being Christian.
@laytexduckie@xanga - Of course not, what I am talking about is the people who clearly freaked out the moment he mentioned the awful "C" word and decided this didn't apply to them. I think it is quite ridiculous that people cannot even handle someone mentioning Christianity in a post and have to make a big deal about it. "Ohhhh no, he said Christian!!!!! Waaaaaahhhhhh how dare he!! That offends my sensibilities as something other than Christian I am going to sue."
@scrambledmegsntoast@xanga - I think it's not a matter of them freaking out because he mentioned Christian, but that tipping and Christianity have no relevance to each other. I mean, surely, that is how the poster looks at tipping. I just don't like how he automatically generalize that because one Christian tips badly that the waiters and waitresses are going to look at every other Christian as bad tippers. That's why I don't like the stereotypes people (and even waiters and waitresses themselves) have in their heads (like assuming that Indians and black people are bad tippers when they haven't even sat down yet).
if i don't get good service, i tip badly or don't tip at all. (but a lot of times, it's included in the receipt)
whenever i'm out with a group of friends, they always give us bad service because we're teenagers
so they give us funny looks and "forget" about our orders.
once, it took them 20 minutes to remember to give us our sprite .__.
this rarely happens when i'm with adults.
@snapeful@xanga - I'm not saying that racism isn't a major problem that plagues minorities and historically speaking has been mostly at the hands of whites. But you have to understand, in my state I AM the minority. Racism is no longer a cut and dry. It is a complex thing that impacts everyone.
I know for a fact that I have been tipped less, or not at all, due to the fact that I'm white. As in, I have heard people say that I don't "need" a big tip because I have everything else. That has nothing to do with my service as a waitress, that's racism. And it sucks. But that doesn't give me or anyone else the right to be a bad server just because one person who happened to be of one ethnic group left me a bad tip. And it doesn't mean that anyone should instantly see their waiter as a racist because they had racist waiter of the the same ethnicity in the past.
@SleepyLaura@xanga - You're presuming things. My main point was that racism exists and you said there are hardly ever good reasons not to tip. I'm not saying I hate all white waiters; I've had very good people serve me before and most of the time they weren't Asian. However, I'm just saying... I've had bad experiences before and therefore have no left tips for those people.
@snapeful@xanga - I apologize if you took that as me presuming things, but you did presume that my life is better, or at least set up that way, because I'm white, and that really isn't fair.
In my opinion, no one will truly understand the power of a tip unless he or she has waited tables. There are days when my customers are pretty much playing God with how much money they leave on the table, and no matter what I do or how good my service is, there's no way they're going to help me make rent. It's part of the risk of waiting tables that really shouldn't be there.
@SleepyLaura@xanga - Okay, then I apologize too. I guess my scope is narrow because of my experiences.
I have never waited tables though I do have experience in the restaurant industry. But yeah. Encountering assholes who are just out to make someone's day worse is a damper on anyone's parade. Working with food is probably one of the most difficult jobs out there. Which is why I quit...